type='text/javascript'/> A Latte Talk: One Starry Night... or one sleepy night

Thursday, February 21, 2008

One Starry Night... or one sleepy night


OK, for my 10th post (WOOHOO!), a silly laugh at Jenny post, originally posted in a MOPS newsletter:


I went to the grocery store one night a few summers ago after my kids went to bed. I had a newborn, so I was a bit... ummm... sleep deprived. It was one of those days where I really intended to go during the day, but I kept getting sidetracked, and never made it. I was, to say the least, very tired. I was in somewhat of a daze, but managed to get everything I needed, and headed home. Somewhere in the deepest part of my little head, I had a fleeting thought that the amount of groceries I had in my cart as I finished my shopping didn’t seem like as many as I had just unloaded into my car. I processed this all, subconsciously, as I drove the few miles back to my house. My thoughts went something like this:
I must have packed those groceries really well in the bags, I thought I had bought more….
How much did I spend on those groceries, anyway?
Hmmm…. I didn’t even look at the receipt when I signed it….
Actually, I don’t remember signing a receipt……
(long pause)
DID I sign a receipt?
(light bulb moment)
I didn’t pay for my groceries.
(sinking feeling)
I walked out of the grocery store without paying for my groceries.
(laughing now)
I STOLE MY GROCERIES!!!!

Well, as I was driving BACK to the grocery store, anxiously awaiting my surely eminent arrest, I was then processing “How did this happen?” I know you’re wondering. Let me explain. I started bagging my groceries right as the checker started scanning my order - just as I always do. Bagging, bagging…. I glanced up and noticed a break in the groceries (a significant one - like at least 2 feet), so I assumed that the break in the groceries was where my order stopped and the next person’s order began, when in reality, those were my groceries, there was just a break because the checker had paused for a little while and I had continued to bag… I did not at all consider that I had yet to pay, I just assumed I was done and I left. Nobody stopped me, nobody even came to look for me (I certainly didn’t hurry to the car.) I left half of my groceries on the belt.

When I returned to the store, there was no police car parked outside (I was seriously nervous about that). It all turned out OK, the manager got a good laugh out of me, saying “Yeah, we thought something was different… most people who steal their groceries steal ALL of their groceries!!!” Not such a clever thief, was I?

I need to be able to laugh at myself, I need to be able to hear that I am not the only one who does crazy goofy things. (Well, I may be the only one who’s ever walked out without paying for her groceries, but that’s OK!!!) I also need to be a real encouragement to other moms who need to hear my crazy goofy stories (I have plenty of them, I assure you!!!).

So... you got any?

7 comments:

Joel said...

I'll make certain Marty reads this.
She'll love it, even though she has never done anything like this! :)

Joel said...

Congratulations on the 10th blog.

So, I have permission to be snotty? I'll try really hard. Sometimes it comes more like an inspiration.

Whose eye is that?

Jenny said...

The eye belongs to Google.

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

HAHAHAHA!!

Ok, you beat me. After Maggie was born and I was in the sleepy stupor, I went to Kroger, I did pay mind you, left, got home, opened the minvan to unload...and it was empty.

I drove back and there were all my groceries, still sitting in the cart in the parking lot!!

Missy @ It's Almost Naptime said...

PS - have you been to the Love Well blog? It's on my blogroll. My new fave. I think you would like it. Read her recent post on Messes. She lives near you too, I think.

Dawn Shelton said...

Oh, I remember the phone call that night on your way back to the store - and you were laughing so hard you could hardly get the story out! :)good times, good times!

Amanda said...

Now, THAT is hilarious! I would've loved to see your expression when you noticed you STOLE YOUR GROCERIES! :)